Balance, where are you?

They say the key to a happy life is to find balance. This becomes absolutely true and necessary with the arrival of the first child in a family ( I guess I will have to revise  the topic after the second one 😉 ) Your balance also gets reevaluated and redefined probably on a daily basis starting with that very day.

I think we had a very nicely balanced life in the first 13 months after the birth of our daughter. They also say happy mother happy child, well I was more than happy to spend all the hours of a day with my daughter and we were both happy. A happy mother also means a happy husband 😀 so we were all very happy during this time period. I know quite pathetic. 😛  This happiness came with a price though reflected in my reduced income which could not continue forever. So I returned to my job and we started the horrible struggle with kindergarten.  Our  13 months of lovely balance turned into a temporary time of great imbalance. It took 7 months and 3 days until the first time she was not crying when being left  at daycare and during this time all of our hearts got broken into several tiny pieces every day. We seem to have survived this without any permanent damage although I have been  carrying a huge amount of bad conscious ever since the first crying day. One day I will apologize to her for letting go through it and she will probably not have a clue what I am talking about.

But getting back to balance. Now that we regained some of it into our life my husband and I decided to take a Saturday off, deliver the child to the grandparents go out for brunch to a cozy little French bistro (we have got a voucher to it as a wedding present 3 years ago…), take a long afternoon nap and manage some paperwork that cannot be done between making a car out of play dough and making dinner. What a nice plan it was. Perfect balance for everybody, happy grandparents, happy child, happy parents.

Friday evening came and with it a coughing child with fever. Saturday plans cancelled, instead of going out staying in the whole day with a cranky daughter. By the end of the day I felt exhausted, disappointed, sad, hungry (those who know me understand what this means. :P) The situation only started getting better on Sunday afternoon while we were all lying in bed including the cat. I was tired but couldn’t really fall asleep on the 10 cm of bed that was left for me with the cat resting at my leg, my daughter on my left arm and a slightly snoring husband on the other side of the mattress. But this crazy moment was the first during that weekend when I thought well there is balance here actually and quite a lot of it. I even managed to document it see below. 😉


Anyways the point is that plans of romantic Saturday lunches get cancelled, but it is all fine as long as they get replaced by some family cuddle time. 😉

P.S. Monday morning in the office and our weekend feels even better than it did yesterday. I look at the picture of my husband and daughter at my desk (yes we have pictures of our small family at our desks 😉 ) and I would even go back to our cranky Saturday. 😉


One thought on “Balance, where are you?

  1. It is strange how memory fades – at least some details of it. We also started with daycare after 13/14 months. Although I still remember how she cried leaving her in the morning – I simply forgot how long this lasted. In November she will be nine years old – and full of positive memories of her daycare- and kindergarten-time and the first years in school.
    In fact I am convinced it has been a great benefit for her having contact with other children of her age that early.

    What I truly remember are those moments of balance like you decribe them. We also had a long time without going to the movies or concerts or anything like that – but every moment with the three of us was more than worth it. 😉


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